


Nimrod

by klarriel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: (this does not apply to dean or cas!), AU, Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Bartender Dean Winchester, Broken Families, Character Death, Depression, F/F, F/M, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Turning Tricks, M/M, Musician Castiel (Supernatural), Nothing too heavy in these areas!!!, Retail Worker Dean Winchester, Slow Burn, Small Towns, i'm so so sorry but
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-14 17:48:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29299908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klarriel/pseuds/klarriel
Summary: Dean Winchester spends his life working two jobs to make ends meet. In the small town of Smith Center, he keeps to himself, his father's words in his head a never-ending reminder of the past he'd rather forget.When Castiel Novak moves into Apartment 7, guitar case in tow, Dean realises that maybe life isn’t just about surviving, and sometimes all it takes is knocking a few walls down to hear the music.A story about love, set to the soundtrack of its inhabitants.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 5
Kudos: 9





	1. i am not the only traveller

**Author's Note:**

> Decided to reupload this story as I decided to make a LOT of edits (not saying this is perfect, I'm uploading this at 1AM because if I don't start uploading I never will).
> 
> This is unbeta'd, so if there's any mistakes please let me know! 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW for a couple of mentions of alcohol in this chapter

Dean can tell it’s not going to be one of his better days the moment he wakes up thirty minutes later than his alarm should have gone off. Noticing the time, he yells, throwing off his sheets and swinging his legs over the edge of his bed. It only takes a moment for him to collapse to the floor, his breaking bedframe throwing him off balance. Scrambling up, he limps to the chair he’d thrown his work uniform on the day before.

He doesn’t even have time to stop to complain when his key jams in his apartment door again, but that sonofabitch Zachariah will definitely be getting a piece of his mind - that’s if the guy’s ever around, at least trying to pretend that he’s performing the basic duties of a landlord.

-

Dean’s on the opening shift at the store. He makes his rounds, clutching his faded brown leather jacket around him tighter as he steps out to set out the two familiar swinging signs next to the front door, enticing customers in. He flicks a switch, and the neon Harvelle’s General Store sign casts a soft green glow out to the still lightening sky. He turns the hanging sign on the door to ‘OPEN’, hangs his coat up in the storeroom, powers up the cash register, and his day begins.

The majority of his shift is filled with the middle-aged residents of Smith Center. The men are usually looking for spare parts for their tools or household machinery, most of which they don’t have, and Dean has to direct them to the hardware store or garage in the centre of town. Some of the women that come in wink at him suggestively as he cashes up their items, but today he’s not in the mood to play along, shooting them quick, fake smiles as he hands them their bags. When the school day ends a flurry of teenagers pour in, counting out enough coins to buy packets of candies and gummy worms. One boy complains moodily that the slushy machine still isn’t working - ‘-and it’s been four weeks now! - but Dean just shrugs apathetically, asking if there’s anything else he can help him with, or if he’s done taking up space in his store. 

Kevin calls in sick for his shift, and so Dean begrudgingly agrees to cover until Jo can come in at 5. 

When she arrives, she can barely get out a ‘Hey Dea-’ before Dean is running out, grabbing his coat and throwing up a hand in a wave. She shakes her head softly, brow furrowing and drawing her lips into a hard line as she watches Dean slide into the driver’s seat of his Impala. 

‘Excuse me dear, I was wondering when you’ll next be stocking up on your canned beans?’

\- - -

As he pulls up beside his apartment complex, Dean’s too engrossed in thinking about what he’ll be making for dinner to notice the U-Haul parked outside his building. In lieu of his absence of a lunch earlier that day, he had snuck a couple of granola bars from the shelf (Ellen won’t mind, probably won’t even notice, he tells himself). In the past, he’d have rationed those out over a couple days, but now, the loud rumble coming from his stomach was more than an indication of how hungry he was.

As he steps out of the car, typing ‘how to fix a slushy machine’ into his phone , he also doesn’t notice the guitar falling directly towards him.

‘Oh, look out!’

Dean barely has time to look up, before the hard case smacks him on the head. He falls back a few steps, one hand catching the guitar before it falls to the ground, the other holding his head.

“What the hell?!”’ 

Dean looks up to see a girl - her tall, pale limbs reach out towards him in reflex. A silver chain adorned with a small set of what looks like wings hangs loosely around her neck, bumping her chin. She can’t be much younger than Sam was the last time he saw him. A strand of her red hair that has escaped her messy bun falls to drape around her face as she bends down, worriedly checking over his head. She reaches to grab the case from him, her brow crinkling with exaggerated, sincere worry.

“I am so, so sorry,” she rushes out, drawing the case towards her body as they both stand, “I pulled it out and it just flew completely out of my hands. I guess I don’t know my own strength…’

She laughs nervously, and Dean gives her a short smile, his lips dropping back down as he rubs the sore spot on his forehead.

“Hey, don’t worry about it” he sighs, dropping his hand, and all he wants right now is his couch, crappy re-runs on TV, a deep dish pizza and a four-pack of beer, “Happens to the best of us...”

Before he has a chance to escape the conversation, she smiles excitedly and nods towards his apartment building 

“You don’t happen to live here do you?” She asks, biting her lip worriedly, the slight blush across her cheeks a hint of her lingering embarrassment.

“Yeah... Who’s askin’?” he replies, raising his eyebrows, and he can’t help the tinge of exasperation that lingers on his words.

The girl quirks her eyebrow, shaking her head. 

“Just want to get to know the neighbours! Me and my brother moved into Apartment 7 in Block C today!” She says, jostling the guitar into one hand and throwing the other out in front of her, smiling, “Anna Novak.”

Dean regards her hand sceptically, looking up to meet her eyes before dropping the hand from his head to shake her own, “Dean. And yeah, I'm in 5.”

“Ah that’s just below us!” She smiles, before looking back at the U-Haul, still mostly full of what looks to Dean like a mix of musical equipment and cardboard boxes, “Well, I better get back to that, these boxes won’t move themselves, nice to meet you Dean!” 

Dean watches her turn and grab a guitar amp with her free hand, heaving it onto the pavement. She stands and enthusiastically wipes her brow. 

His dad’s voice - Dean! You’re not lettin’ a lady carry her own bags are you? - echoes in his head. 

Dean sighs, because despite the fact that this chick deserves no help from his right now, he can’t ignore his conscience. He sighs. 

“You want any help with that?”

“Wow! Yes, that would be so kind of you!” Anna replies instantly, almost as if she had planned this all along, before picking up a microwave and waiting expectantly, smiling widely. 

He clears his throat awkwardly, picking up the amp and the guitar that he had just been viciously attacked by, and follows her into the building. 

\- - -

As the door to Flat 7 creaks open, he glances around. He’s never been inside another apartment in his building before - it’s kind of disturbing to see one identical to his that isn’t his. The identical shelves of the kitchen alcove on the left are packed with kitchen appliances not yet stored away. A ratty maroon sofabed sits to the left of the main room. A rolled-up rug leans against the far wall, between the two windows looking out onto the street below. The golden glow of the evening sun streams in, basking the floor in warmth. 

“You can just put them down wherever” Anna smiles, placing the microwave on the kitchen shelf, before calling out, “Cassie, I met our neighbour!” 

Dean glances around the room, before deciding in the interests of not disturbing whatever decorating plans they’ve got going on, next to the front door is probably the best bet. He places them down, leaning them against the wall. Hearing a noise, he glances towards the source of the rustling coming from the room to the right of the apartment- judging from the layout of Dean’s own flat, the bedroom. The door is closed just enough that he can’t see who’s in there, but almost as soon as he looks, a figure steps out. 

The golden light filtering in through the bedroom window illuminates the figure from behind, casting a shadow over them so Dean can’t see their face. Golden tendrils dance around them, and if Dean didn’t know better, he’d say they were glowing. 

‘Oh, hello…? ” A gruff voice tinged with surprise.

“Dean!” Anna interjects, walking over to join the figure, “Dean, this is my brother Castiel.”

Castiel walks over, and Dean can make out his blue eyes, and the hints of stubble covering his jaw. His mess of brown hair is tousled wildly, and Dean wonders if it’s so messy because of the stress of moving, or if it always just sits like that. He holds Dean’s gaze, his expression not quite readable.

“Hello, Dean” Castiel says, smiling slightly before his eyes drop down to linger on the items on the floor next to Dean.

“Anna!” he scolds, turning to his sister, “Please tell me you have not shirked your responsibilities onto someone i’m assuming is our neighnour? Who I’m assuming you’ve just met?” 

“A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met yet?” She offers, but at Castiel’s lack of reaction she wordlessly drops her gaze to the floor, guiltily scuffing her shoe on the wooden floorboards.

Dean could get mad, especially considering the guitar-to-head incident, but if he’s honest he just doesn’t have the energy. Plus, the kid looks like she could use a break.

“It’s fine really, I was just walking in and she looked like she could use a hand,” Dean says, turning to meet Anna’s gaze, “No biggie.”

Castiel huffs out an annoyed breath, running his hand through his hair and furrowing his brow, but he smiles anyway.

“Well… thank you, very much.” he says, before rushing to pick up the items, “We really won’t keep you any longer.” 

Something niggles at the back of Dean’s head. He can’t define it, but it wasn’t there when he left work. Maybe the guitar induced more brain damage than he thought. 

He takes the opportunity and leaves with a wave, hearing a shouted “Thanks, Dean!” from Anna as he walks downstairs.

\- - -

Dean doesn’t see a lot of the Novak’s for a while. Every now and then he’ll bump into Anna or Castiel on the stairs, and they’ll share polite smiles, but nothing over the top. Sometimes Anna will be on her phone and won’t notice him, or Castiel will be searching for something in his bag and will be too focused to shoot Dean a glance. 

Six weeks go by before he enters Apartment 7 again.

His recent car repair expenses mean he’s had to pick up some evening shifts at Benny’s bar, and as he lies awake at 2 AM having only got home an hour and a half ago, he realises booking one of these shifts before a 7AM Saturday start at the store could have been a massive mistake.

In all honesty, he’s never been that great a sleeper, but the intermittent bangs and cackles, and the slight thrum of the bass shaking the ceiling aren’t helping at all. 

He waits half an hour before he decides enough is enough, and he trudges upstairs, rubbing his hand groggily across his face.

Knocking on the door, he stares at the golden 7 for a few moments until the door opens, a woosh of warm air laced with the scent of cigarette smoke and sickly sweet cherry introducing him to someone he’s never seen before. She’s shorter than Dean, with thick brunette hair and red lips curved into what looks like more of a smirk than a smile. 

She leans on the door frame, studying his face for a few moments before speaking.

“Well hello there Freckles,” She says, her voice a sweet drawl, although she can’t help slurring her words slightly.

Grabbing his hand, she drags Dean towards the group in the centre of the room, his protests seeming futile.

“Found a straggler outside” she announces to the group, who all look up. In the centre of the Novak’s floor is a small circle of three people: Castiel, Anna, and another man Dean doesn’t recognise sit, surrounded by half-full beer bottles and glasses of unknown cocktails, with a deck of cards distributed between the members of the group. The man smirks up at him at the same time as Castiel’s face changes from slightly inebriated to alarmed. Castiel, Anna and the man speak simultaneously at the sight of Dean. 

“Oh my gosh Dean I am so sorry, I told them to keep it dow-”

“Well, well, well… who do we have here then?”

“DEAN!” 

Exclaiming excitedly, Anna jumps up and runs to him, wrapping her arms around him and squeezing hard. He has a few moments to register the embrace, the remnants of his tired state still not allowing him his normal reflex time, before Castiel swiftly follows her up, dragging her arms off of Dean.

“Anna!”, he whispers loudly, looking apologetically at Dean.

“Sorry,” Dean continues, looking to Castiel, “don’t want to ruin your night, was just wondering if you could keep the noise down a bit? I’m up early tomorrow is all and I’d really appreciate it.”

Castiel nods emphatically, Anna just smiles brightly at Dean. The others don’t act so enthusiastically.

“So… Freckles? What’s a guy like you doing in a place like this?” The unknown man drawls, coming to stand next to the woman, taking a swig from a beer bottle and leaning on her shoulder as she lets out a chuckle.

“This is Dean!” Anna interjects, “He’s our neighbour! Well, he lives downstairs …. Dean, this is our brother Gabriel, and our friend Meg. Guys, this is Dean!”

“We get it, name’s Dean,” Meg says, smirking at him again, and he feels the unsettled pit in his stomach grow, “Pity, I so preferred Freckles.”

“My little brother hasn’t told me much about you Dean,” Gabriel says, as Castiel walks over to the speaker to turn the volume down, glancing to look at his brother at the mention of his name, “Stud like you should be living it up in the city! Why, you certainly wouldn’t be out of place at one of those heinous college frat parties - plenty of boobs n’ beer amirite?” 

He chuckles, slapping a hand on Dean’s shoulder, before tilting his head, his expression quizzical. Dean doesn’t know why he doesn’t just leave the room. 

“In fact, even Kansas city has enough of that. What’s a town like this got? Amazing job prospects? Excellent options for first time home buyers? Or maybe… you’ve got something to run away from… wouldn’t that make for an interesting story.”

Gabriel smiles. 

Somewhere in Dean’s head, a line has been crossed, and his face hardens. 

“Not tryin’ to be rude,“ he says, gritting his teeth, “but that’s none of your business.”

He looks at Castiel.

“Like I said, ” Dean shrugs the hand off his shoulder, feeling himself get more annoyed by the second, “try and keep the noise down.”

He walks out before he can hear any more. 

Keep to yourself, stay out of trouble, don’t get attached

If this is what getting to know your neighbours is like, he doesn’t want anything more to do with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title taken from 'Cactus Tree' by Joni Mitchell
> 
> :)


	2. she's so busy being free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What I’m trying to say is...” Castiel continues, and Dean’s becoming aware of the heat the body next to him is emanating, Anna dozing away as she lies at her brother’s opposite side, “According to science...even though we can see so many stars right now, there are millions more that we can’t see…”
> 
> Dean swallows dryly.
> 
> “I think things like that make me feel like there’s something more out there waiting for me, something I haven’t found yet… it’s quite hopeful, don’t you think?.” Castiel continues, and Dean doesn’t say anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for the love on the first chapter, i really appreciate it!! :)
> 
> CW for alcohol for this chapter, it's not mentioned too much though
> 
> (Will also be updating the fic tags for future chapters so that people aren't caught off guard/don't start reading and then have to stop!)
> 
> 💛

Dean doesn’t sleep much that night. 

When his alarm does start blaring out at 6 AM he rolls groggily out of bed, his feet hitting the floor as he lazily punches the snooze button. He sits for a moment, the encapsulating darkness around him familiar and claustrophobic. 

Rubbing his eyes, he stands and walks to his kitchen counter, the promise of his morning coffee the only thing keeping him going. As he waits for the pot to brew, he rummages in his fridge for something to soothe his rumbling stomach. His shelves are pretty bare, but he manages to gather up a couple of ingredients and begins by the stove, frying up some eggs. Standing watching over the pan, he glances out of the window. The sun is starting to rise, painting hues of orange and pink across the sky. 

Dean remembers waking Sam up early every year on the younger brother’s birthday. They would drive out to the nearby viewpoint and sit on the hood of the Impala, watching the day begin as they ate PopTarts Dean stole the night before from the 7/11. Dean would give Sam his present - a hoodie; a new backpack ; one year when Sam was particularly obsessed with mythology, he managed to find a ratty first edition book of ‘The Encyclopedia of Vampires, Werewolves, and Other Monsters’ in a second hand bookshop. Sam had read that book every day for at least a year, the spine becoming worn and the pages wrinkling at the edges. Despite all the clear outs John forced on them over the years, Sam had always kept that book, safely tucked away in the corner of his bookcase. 

Dean wonders if Sam still has it.

Dean goes to work.

-

At work, the lack of sleep makes Dean grouchy. He’s even more blunt and short with customers, earning him a few raised eyebrows from Jo. His tired brain also means that he takes a whole two minutes to realise he’s scanning the wrong side of a loaf of bread, leaving him flustered, and a line of people waiting impatiently. He mutters out an apology as he serves each patron, their impatient, disapproving frowns a little more cutting than they ought to be. 

The light above the middle aisle flickers incessantly.

It’s half way through his shift before Ellen unexpectedly arrives at the store, tying an apron around herself as she walks up to the counter. Ellen is the owner and manager, and so isn’t usually on site, but she’ll make regular trips to the store to help out with inventory and serving customers at peak times - Dean reckons it’s just an excuse to spend quality mother-daughter/employee time with Jo, seeing as these visits are always made when Jo’s on shift. Although, come to think of it, with the store’s small pool of employees, and Jo’s almost constant presence in the building, it’s not much of a surprise.

Dean has switched with Jo, and is emptying crates of bottles of cola into the fridge. He glances over to see Ellen and Jo talking with each other, in a moment of respite between customers. Jo nods at her mum, before quickly muttering something, and they both turn to look at Dean. He turns his head swiftly back to focus on his task at hand.

It’s a few moments before he hears footsteps, and a figure walks up beside him.

“How ya doin’, Dean?”

“Not bad Ellen, not bad… Yourself?”

“Don’t play those games with me, Winchester.” She says, and the tone of her voice makes Dean feel like he’s being told off by his teacher, “Jo says she’s had a couple comments about your behaviour this morning. What’s going on?”

He peers round Ellen to look at Jo - what a grass - before looking back at the older woman

“New neighbours. New noisy partying neighbours.” He explains simply “ Was up til 3 with it. It’s fine though.”

Ellen sighs, breath escaping through her nose

“Dean..” she starts, and she motions for him to put down the bottles of cola in his hands, “Listen. I like you kid. The customers… tolerate you… most of the time. But - “

“Is this you firing me?” Dean plainly interjects, and the thought of having to give up this job brings him relief and terror all at once.

Ellen’s face pulls into an incredulous expression, and she lets out a short laugh

“No Dean, this is not me firing you,” she rolls her eyes, “Look, I’ll be straight with you kid. I took you on because I could see how much you needed the job, and like I said - I like you. But if you’re gonna get anywhere with this, you gotta start lightening up a little! Hell, it’s been what, two, three years? And you’ve hardly said more than a few words to any of us. You can see how I’d be a bit concerned at this point?”

Dean stares down at his feet, his jaw clenched. A clearance sticker clings to the bottom of his shoe, and he uses his other foot to peel it off.

“All i’m saying is - all of us have bad days, but… Dean, you need to be careful you don’t carry on like this. I can’t keep makin’ excuses for you.”

She smiles slightly and playfully punches his shoulder

“Just stop walkin’ around here so gloomy - you’re gonna’ drive the customers away!” 

He laughs lightly and looks up at her.

“I do really appreciate the job, Ellen. The job, and everything-”

“I know you do sweetie” she smiles, and the punch turns into a comforting hand on his arm, “I’m just worried about you, that’s all. You never seem too happy at work, and I never see you round Smith Center with anyone. You should give people a chance! I know i’m biased, but Jo ain’t that bad to have a conversation with?”

Dean huffs out a laugh, and nods as he glances over at the younger woman, who is currently scanning through 15 individual packets of gum. 

Ellen places the remaining bottle of cola into the fridge, before smiling at Dean and walking into the back room.

“Hey!” she calls as she turns to peer around the stock room door, “Party at 3AM on a weeknight? Those neighbours sound like fun - might be a good place to start?” 

Dean presses his lips together, his brow creasing, as Ellen walks away to count boxes of laundry detergent. 

-

The afternoon comes, and when he gets home he’s more than ready to fall back into bed. He deposits his coat and bag on the hook at his front door and throws his shoes, scraping a hand through his hair. His head has no sooner hit the pillow when he hears a faint knocking.

For a moment he thinks he imagines it, before the knock is repeated, louder this time.

Of course Zachariah would pick now to bring up some minor issue, that will inevitably leave Dean inconvenienced in some way.

He sighs, pulling himself up and dragging his feet to his front door. Opening it, he rubs his hand over his face. 

“What is it Zachariah?” 

“Um… Hello Dean” 

Dean startles, dropping his hand to see blue eyes, and a mess of brown hair.

His neighbour?

“It is Dean, right?” the man asks, and shit Dean’s forgotten this guy’s name

“Uh yeah…. Hey…..”

“Castiel.” he offers sympathetically, “Don’t worry, I understand if you’ve forgotten... it’s quite unusual.”

They stand in silence for a few moments.

“Oh…..ok”

They stand in silence for a few more moments. Dean’s not sure if his overtired brain is making this weird or if it’s Castiel - the guy’s just standing there, looking at him with an expression that Dean can’t quite decipher. 

“Was there something you wanted?” Dean offers, raising his eyebrows encouragingly

“Oh, of course!” Cas blurts out, seeming to come to his senses, his cheeks tinged a faint pink from embarrassment, “I just... wanted to apologise for last night - I understand it really wasn’t the best impression of us as new neighbours, and if we’d known you were up so early I definitely wouldn’t have let it go on so late”

“Hey, happens to the best of us man - I won’t hold it against you”, he shakes his head lightly, offering a small smile as a sign of a peace offering, “Just give me a heads up next time, yeah?”

Castiel returns his smile, nodding gratefully. 

They stand for a moment.

“Well,” Dean gives Castiel a courteous wave, “I think i’m gonna-”

“-oh, of course , sorry!”

“- get some shut eye”

Dean moves to close his door, before Castiel speaks again.

“Dean?” 

He holds in a sigh, pulling his door open again.

“Obviously… Well, my brother and Meg are visiting, and so …. we thought we’d get some food, go on drive? We’re new to the town, so we just wanted to have a look around… Anyway, we were wondering… Well, Anna was wondering…. If you’d like to join us? Dinner on us, to set things right? ”

Dean pauses, his groggy brain finding it difficult to read the situation. 

What’s the catch? Are they mad at him for ruining their night? Are they terrible people who want to drag him off into the woods, only for his body to be found a few weeks later?

Would anyone care if he was missing?

His dad’s voice echoes in his head

Never trust anyone.

Ellen’s voice echoes in his head

You should give people a chance! 

He’s sleep deprived.

His fridge is pretty bare.

Castiel’s eyes look kind. 

“ …. Yeah. Okay. Deal.”

-

Anna knocks at 7PM. She smiles brightly as Dean opens the door, lacing her arm around his and pulling him out. Dean meets Castiel’s eyes, and gives him a startled nod in acknowledgement. Gabriel joins Dean at his left side, apologising profusely for how he behaved the night before. Meg keeps pace, nodding in agreement, but not offering much in way of grovelling. 

As they make their way out through the door of the complex, Anna lets go, and Dean takes the opportunity to move to Castiel’s side.

“So, where are we actually going?” He asks quietly, screening for potential poisoning risks.

“The day we moved here, we saw a place out of town that has all you can eat spaghetti for $9.99,” Castiel offers, stopping at the edge of the pavement, “You like Italian?”

“Who doesn’t?” Dean replies, gaining a small smile from Castiel.

-

The group pile into Gabriel’s car, Dean sitting on the back seat at the right hand side. The feeling of not sitting in the driver’s seat is alien to him at this point, and he kind of feels like a kid being driven to school again, but he ignores the uneasiness as they click their seatbelts into place and set off. Gabriel and Meg argue over music choices as Anna turns to Dean in the back seat. 

“So, Dean!” she smiles, “One of the first questions I ask anyone: What’s your favourite song?” 

Dean doesn’t hide his surprise at the question, and he looks at her quizzically.

“That’s really the first thing you ask someone?”

She shrugs

“I’m a musician, I can tell a lot about someone by their favourite song.”

“A musician, huh?” he asks, almost disbelievingly, “What you play?” 

Anna tilts her head thoughtfully.

“I mostly sing and play guitar. Most of us are pretty musical - Cas plays guitar and piano, and-”

“And I play the tambourine!” Gabriel yells from the front seat, his voice drowned out slightly by the voice of the Smooth Radio Station host. 

“Ha ha ha. Very funny.” Anna scowls , rolling her eyes and turning back to Dean, “Gabriel has the least musical aptitude in our family.”

“Aw, come on now Annie, that’s not fair,” Meg smiles in the front seat, “Give him some credit - he at least knows how to play the triangle!” 

The three of them continue bickering, the conversation with Dean forgotten, as he relaxes back and watches them. It’s been a long time since he sat with a group of people like this, much less with people he didn’t really know. As sorry a sight as he was, awkwardly sitting in the back seat of a stranger’s car, he couldn’t deny the small spark of something like excitement he felt in the pit of his stomach. 

For whatever reason, he glances to his left to see Castiel staring out the car window. The other man’s window is rolled down almost the full way, and the wind billows through his hair - Dean wonders if this is why, for the few times he’s seen Castiel up close, his hair always ends up looking so messed up. The light of the passing storefronts and streetlamps illuminates his face, giving him that same, almost angelic glow he’d had the day before - Dean was starting to think that maybe the light was coming from Castiel himself, he couldn’t say he was was one hundred percent sure it wasn’t at this point. As they drive further out of Smith Center, the illuminations are replaced by the headlights of passing cars, bursts of light casting Castiel’s features in white. His eyes are closed, arm resting on the door frame so that his fingers hang loosely out of the window, catching the wind as they drive through the town. Gabriel cranks the radio up, the other inhabitants of the car singing along to an upbeat folk song. Castiel looks content, and Dean can’t help but be fascinated by it. 

Dean only lets himself watch Castiel for a few moments, and by that time they’ve arrived. 

-

At Breadstix, everyone gets the all you can eat spaghetti deal. As they wait for their food, they sit and chat. 

It turns out Anna wasn’t lying - she and Castiel are musicians… of sorts. Castiel has gotten a job at the Smith Center library, and Anna has found a waitressing job at diner in town, but in their spare time they enjoy playing music together. 

“Sometimes we write songs too. And,” Anna hesitates, evidently opening up to the rest of the group, “I’d kind of like to play them. To other people. Like… in public.”

She turns to Castiel.

“You’d do it with me, right C?” She asks hopefully, obviously employing her nickname for her brother.

“Look out,” Meg drawls, “it’s the next Simon and Garfunkel” 

Castiel bites the skin on his lip, before smiling slightly and nodding.

“If if would make you happy, Annie”

-

Over the meal, Dean finds out more information about them all. Castiel is 23 - only a year younger than Dean - and Anna is 19. 

Not much younger than Sam, Dean muses

Gabriel is a couple years older, the three of them being the youngest of six. Meg is a close family friend, particularly to Gabriel and the older siblings, and both of them have come to help Castiel and Anna settle in before heading back home.

When he asks where home is, the topic is somehow turned to Dean.

Dean explains that he’s lived in the town for three years, and works two jobs - one at Harvelle’s General Store store, and the other at The Roadhouse, a bar near the outskirts of town.

“Do you have any siblings, Dean?” Anna asks innocently, sipping her lemonade, and before he has to think of how to answer he’s saved by the waitress dumping a giant plate of pasta in front of him.

-

The rest of the meal passes uneventfully - the spaghetti isn’t anything to write home about, but Dean is happy to spend most of the time sitting back and listening to the others talk. Castiel or Anna will sometimes ask him a question or make a comment that includes him in the conversation, but he sticks to easy conversation and answers that allow him to fade into the background again. He knows he might be coming across as rude, but he can’t bring himself to care too much. At the end of the day, he tells himself, he only came for the free food, and the chance at getting out of his god awful apartment for the night. 

Somewhere along the line, Castiel gets a small smudge of spaghetti sauce on his cheek. 

-

Dean tries to pay, but Anna and Castiel are insistent. 

Having been sat in at the wall, Dean is the last to leave their booth, and as they make their way out of the restaurant, their waitress catches him on the way, smacking her lips together as she chews a stick of gum and holds out a slip of paper.

“Coupon for twenty percent off next time you come,” she explains in a monotonous tone, evidently having been forced into this by her manager, “Have a bellissimo day.”

“Uh… thanks.” Dean replies, taking the coupon and pocketing it, “You too.”

-

The group stuff themselves back into the car, full from the mountains of carbohydrates they have all ingested.

“Where’s good around here, Cassie?” Gabriel asks his brother, pulling a map out from the glove compartment as they decide on a beauty spot to drive to.

“I’m as clueless as you at this point, Gabe” Castiel replies, watching Anna’s phone as she tries unsuccessfully to Google ‘Top beauty spots near Smith Center’.

“The connection out here’s a piece of shit” Meg spits, her Maps app failing to load as quickly as she’d like.

Dean feels the lack of direction starting to become awkward, and so Dean decides to diffuse it and speak up.

“There’s, uh … There’s a cool spot not far from here, Nash Reservoir I think it’s called?” Dean offers, and all but Gabriel glance to look at him, “It’s pretty cool, especially at this time of night” 

“Nash Reservoir it is” Meg drawls, turning back to face the front, “You reckon you could get us there, Deanie?” 

Dean’s brows furrow for a moment at the unsavoury nickname, before leaning forward and pointing to the road.

“All you have to do is follow that road straight, it’ll probably be a ten minute drive until the turn off sign, after that you can’t miss it ”

“Sounds good to me!” Gabriel says joyfully, and they pull out of the parking lot. 

As they drive, Dean wonders if he will ever not feel like he’s about to burst from spaghetti overconsumption.

-

When they arrive, the area is deserted, with most nearby residents choosing to visit during the sunny midday heat. They step out, parking the car and making their way over to the grassy edge of the reservoir. 

The body of water stretches out in a vast expanse, its surface perfectly smooth, reflecting the sky full of stars - bundles of light that on some night make Dean feel so insignificant in a Universe far, far bigger than him. 

On the other nights, he’s looked up the the sky to feel less alone, and had their twinkling 

“Wow” Dean hears, and he turns to see Castiel staring up at the sky, eyes glittering, mouth open in awe. 

“Less light pollution” Dean muses, his eyes also fixed on never ending darkness intercepted by thousands of balls of light a million light years away. 

“Is this is?” Meg mutters. 

Cas huffs out a breath at that. 

-

Gabriel pulls a cooler full of beers out of the trunk, and Meg brings out a blanket, spreading it on the ground. Gabriel offers Dean a beer, which he accepts sceptically, and they all sit in silence on the ground, swigging their drinks.

Not much conversation is made, they’re all too busy digesting their food. Every now and then Meg and Gabriel will have a whispered conversation, both chuckling, before returning to their beers. Castiel and Anna lie on the blanket, Castiel pointing out constellations to his sister. 

Crickets chirp. The distant hum of cars is barely audible. 

Dean thinks he should feel awkward, but he doesn’t. 

-

Dean doesn’t drink much more - he’s working in the morning and after Ellen’s speech earlier that day, he decides he needs to start making a good impression. He tries to ignore the part of himself that knows he’s just reluctant to let go in front of people he doesn’t trust yet.

He’s so engrossed in his own thoughts that he’s pretty surprised to feel a tap on his knee, and he looks to see Castiel looking up towards him.

“Come look at this.’ He says, patting the blanket beside him. 

Dean hesitates, not really sure where this is going, before he eventually shifts down, lying to rest beside him. 

He looks up at the stars, as he so often had with Sam, feeling a lump in his throat. 

At Castiel’s silence, Dean speaks.

“...What am I looking at?” 

“Just...look.” Castiel says, and Dean’s not completely sure how long they’ve been lying there, but Castiel’s tone carries the same wonder as it had the moment they arrived, “Like… that is the whole universe is out there, with so many things undiscovered. We see all of these stars, but we don’t really know about all of them.”

“...Was there somethin’ more than beer in those bottles?” 

Castiel huffs in annoyance. Gabriel and Meg are too wrapped up in their own conversation to bother to pay attention to what the two of them are discussing.

“Of course not. I don’t know… a starry sky has always felt comforting to me. So many stars out there, and in a way we’re a part of it all. ”

Dean’s not sure how to reply to that, because for some reason, he’s always felt the same.

“What I’m trying to say is...” Castiel continues, and Dean’s becoming aware of the heat the body next to him is emanating, Anna dozing away as she lies at her brother’s opposite side, “According to science...even though we can see so many stars right now, there are millions more that we can’t see…”

Dean swallows dryly.

“I think things like that make me feel like there’s something more out there waiting for me, something I haven’t found yet… it’s quite hopeful, don’t you think?.” Castiel continues, and Dean doesn’t say anything. 

-

They sit for not much longer after that, before Anna starts yawning and they decide it’s time to head back. 

Due to his relative sobriety, Dean is persuaded to become the designated driver. He doesn’t mind - despite the unfamiliar steering wheel, the focus of the road has always been a comfort to him. 

Halfway through the drive, Anna, Meg and Gabriel end up sound asleep in the back seat, evidently not fully recovered from their night before, with Castiel sitting up front with Dean.

Castiel turns the tuning dial on the radio, listening out for anything familiar. It takes a while before he finally settles on a song that’s unfamiliar to Dean, and leans back into his seat, gaze facing out of the window and his hand gently tapping on the door frame to the beat as a new song starts. 

The song plays for about a minute, with Castiel humming along to every word, and Dean still has no clue what the hell this is.

He feels more comfortable here, with Castiel being the only other conscious person in the car, and after everything he’s done for him tonight, he really does deserve some form of proper conversation from Dean. 

“Who is this?” he asks, glancing over at the man in the passenger seat.

Castiel seems somewhat surprised at the interaction, glances down at the radio, before turning to look at Dean.

“This?” Castiel clarifies, pointing to the console, “Joni Mitchell.”

“Oh, cool”, Dean says, raising his eyebrows and shrugging, eyes still trained on the road, “Never heard of her.”

Castiel’s jaw almost drops off of his face.

“Never heard of her?” he asks, as incredulously and emphatically as his tired body will let him, the alcohol in his system still providing him with a boost of drunken energy.

Dean laughs softly and shakes his head.

“Sorry,” Castiel says, sitting back in his seat again, “Joni Mitchell, to me, she’s…. I don’t know, I guess I love her music so much I find it unthinkable that other people wouldn’t have any clue who she is.”

Dean lets their words hang in silence for a few moments as he listens to the song. It’s almost celestial, the woman’s voice soft and perfectly complemented by the strums of guitar.

“I like it.” he says he simply, glancing at Castiel and quirking his lips into a small grin.

Castiel watches this, staying silent for a moment, before turning to train his eyes on the road ahead.

“This one’s called ‘Cactus Tree’” he clarifies, “It’s one of my favourites of hers. Perhaps one of my favourite songs ever.”

Dean nods his head in acknowledgement, checking the bypass for any oncoming traffic.

“How come?” he asks, and as they turn the corner and pass The Roadhouse he recognises they’re not far from their apartments. 

Castiel mulls this over for a few moments

“Well, obviously it’s a beautiful song, but... I guess part of it is the meaning,” he explains, turning his head towards Dean, “At least to me, whenever I would listen to this when I was younger, I… I don’t know.”

He pauses, and Dean doesn’t push it. The silence only lasts for a few seconds, before Castiel smiles solemnly and refocuses on Dean as he pulls up in the apartment parking lot. 

“It sounds like freedom, don’t you think?.” 

As the car is brought to a stop, Gabriel stirs, waking Meg and Anna who were leaning on his shoulders. They lazily rub their eyes and stretch.

-

Two days later, as Dean returns from a long day at work, he hears the familiar purr of a car engine revving up next to him. 

“Freckles!” 

Dean looks up to see Gabriel peering out of his car window, smirking to himself as Meg stares at her phone. Dean hesitates, before walking over to join them.

“You headed home?”

Gabriel nods, before looking back to grab his own phone out of his coat pocket.

“Listen,” he starts, “My brother and sister are out here on their own, and Cassie is oh so hell bent on doing this himself but… everyone needs their family sometimes, right?”

Dean tries not to react, just gives a soft nod upwards in reply. 

“Yeah, yeah… I guess so.”

“Right, anyway… Could you give me your number? Don’t get too excited now Dean, this isn’t a come on… At the end of the day you’re the closest person to them that’s here, and I just think it would be better to have someone to contact, or someone who can contact us, in case something happens and we can’t get to them… It’s for emergencies only, I promise!”

Dean’s about to protest, but Gabriel is convincing, giving him the most solemn, pleading look he can muster.

There can’t be too much harm in it, Dean concedes, Could just block him if it gets too weird. Had plenty of practice with it before.

A few moments later, Dean and Gabriel have exchanged numbers, and Dean doesn’t have time to regret his decision before Gabriel slams on the accelerator and the car is speeding off.

“Look after the children!” he hears Gabriel call out.

Dean offers a wave, watching them drive along the main road and disappear around the corner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title taken from 'Cactus Tree' by Joni Mitchell
> 
> :)


End file.
